Tuesday, 2 June 2009
Ma Jian on 6/4
Full Article at: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/jun/02/tiananmen-square-protests-1989-china
Wednesday, 8 April 2009
Nothing left to blog..
Life as a full time student for the past 4 years has been comfortable, spending days in the library, taking coffee breaks whenever we please, having the freedom to take weeks or even months on a piece of work, there is little pressure for the student of today. Especially here at RGU; I can't speak for students of other universities, but here it seems that life is a great deal easier than elsewhere. When I was at college, I envisaged life at RGU to be tough and dare I say, intellectually demanding. At times, it has been: notable highlights include the Technology and Culture, and Media Semiotics modules. Notable low points include the now infamous RGU Fashion Show in 3rd year, and Public Relations and Marketing classes.
I really have no idea what path lays before me as I prepare to graduate from life as a student; there is no more shelter or elaborate pretense of progress provided by being a student. I've signed up for an online course in TEFL, which should keep me amused for a couple of months. But after that, its probably time to join the real world....'sigh'.
Sunday, 22 March 2009
The Boy in the Stripped Pyjamas
It is an emotional tale of a brutal Nazi, who moves his family into the German countryside, near the labour camp for which he is responsible, only for his 8 year old son to strike a bizarre kinship with a boy in the camp. It's a little like the Kite Runner from this point of view, where the two boys share a common childhood innocence, yet in circumstances that we are constantly reminded of.
Its a brutal and harrowing film, yet endearing and thought-provoking at times as well....
It was around at the similar time of other, more covered, World War 2 films Valkyrie, and Defiance.
It's been overlooked and probably under-rated because of this, I would recommend it to anyone who believes that often the most inspiring tales are born from the cruelest times....
Friday, 20 March 2009
The Philosophy of "Just".....
This morning, I had a class for Political Communication, to discuss the use of 'fear tactics' in political campaigns and in the media. We were asked 'what are we most afraid of?', as students who are on the verge of graduating from University after 4 years. Most people agreed that the biggest 'fear' facing them was the prospect of not getting a job. Given the economic environment at the moment, we can hardly move for someone telling us that unemployment is at an all time high, and that we're all doomed to a life of soup-kitchen sandwiches and dole cues. An example is given that a student who graduated with our degree last year is yet to find a job, despite consistent performance at university and having the 'nice guy' quality that always wins in a job interview. I'm pretty sure though, that say 3 or 4 years ago when the economy was at it's brightest, there were still a few graduates floating around in no-mans land a year or two after completing their degree, in fact I'm sure of it, I know a bunch of people who "couldn't find a job" or said that "there are no jobs" and ended up working flat out at bars, supermarkets, restaurants and so on. I really don't think the situation has changed much since then, if you're employable then you'll get employed; OK maybe you'll have to put more effort into making yourself more employable, but the principle remains the same.
The conversation drifted into a bit of a tangent there-after, when questioned as to why they wanted to "just get a job", consensus was that "a job" was really all that mattered, hence the "just". "Just" getting a job, so that we can "just" buy a house and a car, and "just" earn money. Why? Because "at the end of the day", paying the bills is what matters. It's hard to argue against this, because we all do need to survive, and paying bills helps. People always back-down when money comes into play, especially if the argument is with a single mother against a tv chef who is hell bent on persuading her not to "feed her starving children" with battery powered chickens. "But I'm a single mother, I don't have that much money" - "Oh, OK, fair enough".
It was suggested that adopting the philosophy of "just", was at the root of anti-social behavior and alcoholism in Britain. As people use "just" in their day to day life, they are driven positively insane at the weekends to the point of mindless violence and anger. This gets even worse when we go on holiday and smash up a small Greek island for a couple of weeks in summer. Britain is an achieving country, that is in small doubt, we've had a consistently strong economy, arguably due to the fact that we have one of the longest working days in Europe. Yet we have persistent social and cultural deficits, arguably due to the fact that we have one of the longest working days in Europe. The philosophy of "just" works in some domains, whilst leaves others in ruin.
Do something you love, something which you're passionate about, wealth doesn't have to mean money, love, family, friends and life happiness are true wealth.
Thursday, 19 March 2009
1989
written by a former student who took part in the student protests in China in 1989, which eventually led to the now infamous incident at Tiananmen Square on June 4th.
Wednesday, 18 March 2009
Sunday, 15 March 2009
Today's lesson: Fen Qing
Some of the current viewpoints of the fenqing:
- U.S. is a monolith. America is bad, bad and bad because Bush is bad.
- Anti-Japan and call for boycotting Japanese products while enjoying Japanese AV or cartoons.
- China’s stock market slumps because of the conspiracy of the imperialist western countries. The price of housing in China skyrocketed because of the hot money of the international speculators.
- Western countries led by the U.S. are trying to encircle and contain China.
- The Internet should be censured and any bad information, like the flies or mosquitoes outside the room, must be screened and filtered.
- CNN is evil because it lied, but it is fine for CCTV to modify the information to maintain the stability of the society.
This post from ThinkWierd goes into greater detail on this interesting phenomenon.
Friday, 13 March 2009
What is discourse analysis?
Firstly, Wikipedia says that in discourse analysis the word "discourse" is often used as shorthand for "discursive formation" meaning large heterogeneous discursive entities. In social sciences, discourse is considered to be an institutionalized way of thinking that can be manifested through language, a social boundary defining what can be said about a particular topic, as Judith Butler puts it, "the limits of acceptable speech".
A few journals I came across talk about Fairclough's methods of discourse analysis. He formed the branch known now as critical discourse analysis, which has a 3-tier framework: analysis of texts, interactions and social practices at the local, institutional and societal levels. Furthermore, each discursive event (discourse): it is a spoken/written text; it is an instance of discourse practice; and it is part of social practice.
- The analysis of the text involves the study of language structures (which I take to mean grammar, vocabulary, sentance structure etc.) produced in a discursive event (which I take to mean a discourse)
- Analysis of the discursive event involves examining the production, consumption and reproduction of texts
-The analysis of socio-cultural practice (what's being done/said) involves an exploration of what is happening in a particular socio-cultural framework (what's going on at the time).
Critical Discourse Analysis, according to Fairclough, attributes 3 dimensions to every discourse: text, discursive practice, and social practice. (Titscher et al. 2000: p.149-150)
I have this information, but I still don't know how to put to use when doing my analysis of the China blogs.........
~~Keep reading~~
Thursday, 12 March 2009
Britain, let me Love you again
I love Britain, why? I love some of the small traditions we have: I love fish and chips, not a healthy meal by all means, but then again no-one would seriously think about eating it all the time (right?). I love a pint of beer down at my local pub, but I wouldn't drink every night, and when I do drink I don't keep doing so until I think I can fly and/or bottle/knife someone.
Poor health and anti-social behaviour are problems in Britain, to solve this, it is suggested that booze and chocolate are made more expensive. I refute this; money cannot be used to solve a cultural deficite that has initially been created by money itself. Abundance and lack of self control have meant that people who like a drink or a slice of cake don't know where to stop in their indulgence and in doing so have lost what made our country Great to begin with.
Putonghua
In the order that I wrote them in my notebook....
bi yie - graduation
da xue bi yie - university graduation
yi zhuan yen - in the blink of an eye
you qu xi - have good future prospects
shang xue de shi ho xiang gong zou - when I was studying I wanted to work
xien zai bi yie le, bu xiang... - now that I have graduated, I don't want to...
ban shi - knowledge and skills
ming zhong zhu ding - it's destiny
Zhao Ziyang's 3 significant concepts
1. That the Party should have "Supervision by public opinion" (yu lun jian du)
2. That the Party should inform the people about important events (zhong da shi qing rang ren min zhi dao)
3. That the people should participate in the discussion of important issues (zhong da wen ti jing ren min tao lun)
While these notions did not challenge the Party's fundamental assumptions, they did suggest significant moves towards less paternalistic and more democratic communication and decision making."
Zhao (1998: p.35,36)
Chinese - on Ken's terms.....
I've been listening to Chinesepod lessons from this guy for the past 4 years, admittedly probably not as frequently as I could have, but who has the time. Ken Carrol has a full page write-up in the FT paying homage to his successes. Chinese is becoming a popular choice for language learners these days, I'll see you all on the band-wagon.
From the Financial Times:
Ken Carroll is challenging a basic tenet in the global economy: that we all need to learn Mandarin Chinese to conquer the world’s largest market – but that learning Chinese is boring. Mr Carroll, a Shanghai-based language teacher turned internet entrepreneur, says that does not have to be so: he has pioneered a painless podcast method for learning Mandarin, and nearly a quarter of a million people worldwide are using it on Chinesepod.com, which sends daily Mandarin lessons to iPods and Google phones around the world.
Chinesepod revenues have defied the global economic downturn, too, rising 250 per cent from December 2007 to the same month last year and climbing strongly again in January, according to the company. Study without suffering may sound too good to be true, but there seem to be plenty of people willing to listen to this particular siren song, especially now that more professionals are taking enforced vacations from the workforce, giving them time to learn new skills such as languages.
Investment analysts think education in China could even prove to be a recession-proof business. Bejing’s National Office for Teaching Chinese as a Foreign Language says 40m foreigners studied Mandarin last year. Chinesepod is riding that wave: with China’s economy expected to grow by 8 per cent this year – compared with a flat global economy – learning Chinese has rapidly begun to look like a clever investment.
Photos, past, present and future.....
So many photos, so little time, so many memories: A reminder perhaps that two souls are born to travel forever together.
This journey inspires another trip, several places already on the wishlist: Norway, Bruges, Istanbul, Taiwan, Japan, Xinjiang, Thailand, Cambodia, Isle of Wight....
Jiu Zhai Gou
China's Mystic Waters
"Jiuzhaigou means "valley of nine villages," because it once harbored nine, but other numbers are more significant now. About 80 hotels are clustered cleanly at the mouth of a Y-shaped, 20-mile-long valley in the Min Mountains of central China, where 280 buses wait to shuttle this day's 18,000 or so visitors up the very pretty route, past a chain of flower-colored, ribbony lakes and fingery waterfalls, underneath escarpments chevroned with maple, spruce, or bamboo forests cut by the talus of old landslides. Boardwalks circuit the little lakes and reedy creeks, and the buses stop to let parties of trippers stroll at their own pace"."The geology in this part of the Tibetan Plateau is not granite, like the Sierras, but seabed, like our Rockies, so its limestones, dissolving, color the waters emerald or turquoise in a certain light or enhance the mirroring of an azure sky. Avalanches, in blocking the creeks, sculpted the lakes, but by legend, sky goddesses dropped their cosmetics into several, and mermaids swam in others. Calcium carbonate deposits on the bottom sometimes assumed fanciful shapes—sleeping dragons or whatnot".
"Along the bus route there's a Golden Bell Lake, Grass Lake, a Pearl Shoals Falls, Arrow Bamboo Falls, a Five Flower Lake and Five Colored Pond, a Sparkling Lake, Tiger Lake, Bonsai Lake, Swan Lake, Rhinoceros Lake, Double Dragon Lake, Reed Lake, Panda Lake, and Mirror Lake, which reflects, as the others do, the menagerie of the clouds, the birches, willows, and pines, the tinctures and hues of sunrise and sunset on rock faces and cliffs. Five shades of green, three of scree. Although the names sound promotional, Buddhist mysticism, and certainly the Bon religion that predated it and underlies it for many Tibetans, animated these lakes and rivers with spirits that the mineralized waters might fortuitously personify, whether mermaid or monster".
The 'hyper-real' order of the Chinese Panda
"The black-masked eyes of the pandas ubiquitously displayed on placards around the region look more tear-stained than cuddly like a nursery toy. A million of these must have been manufactured by now for every specimen that remains, uncute, in the wild"
"The intensely lovely little Jiuzhaigou complex of chromatic lakes in glacially awled mini-valleys is already nearly bereft of the tubby black-and-white pandas that once thrived here—an animal now trumpeted by the government as "our national treasure" but displaced wholesale by heedless logging and a die-off of bamboo during the last decades of the past century; more than one Tibetan described the decimation to me. Masticating bamboo shoots in a semireclining position, like a sea otter munching mollusks while lounging on its back, the panda has become an endearing emblem for conservationists worldwide and carries a heavy load in this supercharged robber-baron economy. Conservation would be a novel concept to anyone unacquainted with what is supposed to be preserved, such as wildness, wildlife, natural beauty. I noticed at the Beijing Zoo that the visitors seemed to have no feeling one way or another for the apparent thirst of the bears in their waterless pit or the metronomic jackals and wolves ticktocking in the heat. In the greenery of Chengdu's parks, the din of birdsong was so frenetic and dense as to imply an extreme scarcity of nesting spaces elsewhere. Only recently did the People's Republic bar the serving of delicacies like bears' paws at official government banquets, about the same time the Dalai Lama, in his Indian exile, urged his followers to end the wearing of tigers' or leopards' skins"
Transforming the spectacle of nature?
"Solitude is almost a vestigial pleasure, now that electronic entertainment can accompany us anywhere. Yet, if not from God, aren't we borrowing our planet from our children, as the saying goes, and if so, shouldn't we deliver it to them in habitable shape? Neither Marxism nor Buddhism would dispute that contention, except for the changing concept of what to think of as habitable. If we consider ourselves not just preeminent among but preemptive of any other form of life—if people simply do not care, apart from culinary calculations, when few unfarmed fish are left, or roadless ridgelines without windmills pinwheeling on them, or snowfields or meadowlarks—then the few who do care and who wish to relax from the pell-mell continuum may have to obtain surround-sound film clips of Ansel Adams–type wilderness imagery for their wall-scale computer screens. Video virtualizations corresponding to white noise may outsell these because, in fact, we're getting to prefer virtualizing so fast. But queues of citizens will still be trundled in, as at Jiuzhaigou, to tread the boardwalks and purchase tchotchkes from costumed hawkers at the end of the bus route. The harlequin pattern of crib and playroom pandas, like tiger camouflage, is with us to stay. Jungle-striped but captive-bred, the cats remain as de rigueur for zoos as pandas are going to be after the trees are gone, much like the replicated Tibetan monasteries with correct facades and paint schemes but no monks living inside."
Full article at: http://ngm.nationalgeographic.com/2009/03/jiuzhaigou/hoagland-text/1
Perhaps paradise is not what it seems.....? Decide for yourself.
Here are some of my own photos from Jiu Zhai Gou, taken in July 2007
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Thursday, 5 March 2009
GuangdongHua - Where?
Gaw Do - There
Nei Do - Here
tsi saw hai bin do a? - Where is the toilet?
Tuesday, 3 March 2009
The Line has moved because the People have pushed it.~~~
We are so often told that freedom of speech is violently suppressed in China and that the media is operated under the watchful eye of the state, where mentions of Tibet, 1989, Falun Gong and Taiwan are among some of the politically sensitive topics that are off-limits to journalists. China, under the leadership of Hu Jintao, places great emphasis on maintaining a 'harmonious society' and that social instability and dissidence are among the greatest threats to the nation. This is a country of over 1 billion people, so its understandable that the government want to maintain social stability, an uprising of any great relevance could have disastrous implications for China - especially undesirable given their current status as the emerging global power. The Party goes to great lengths to ensure that this kind of dissidence does not get out of hand; employing the most advanced and sophisticated filtering capabilities in the world (The Golden Shield Project). In addition to this, in exchange for entering the Chinese Internet market, companies such as Google, Microsoft and Yahoo! have developed software which filters certain information, usually through blocking searches for a key-word, and prevents those in China accessing the same information as those outside. To combat this censorship, the American government as well as several NGO's (Freedom House, CPJ, etc.) have invested in promoting so called 'free-speech' in China through the use of circumvention software, such as Ultra-Reach.
China is estimated to have 47 million bloggers with 72 million blogs, a number which is rising daily. Blogs generally cover a number of topics, personal life, commentary, specialist topics, hobbies, food, travel, news, current affairs and politics. Some bloggers have caused unrest and controversy in China (Hu Jia, Xu Lai, etc.) because of their writings, but generally blogs serve as an outlet for citizens to vent frustrations, comments, and opinions on aspects of their everyday life.
I personally don't like the imperialist and elitist attitude taken by the western press over China; there is censorship and filtering in our countries as well, and considering our companies developed the software for China, were not in any position to start lecturing others on democracy and free speech. The way I see it, is that the mainstream media is generally in decline, what I see in our media on a daily basis is fairly uninspiring, and the prospect that ordinary citizens can now create their own news medium, a platform for debate, discourse and opinion can only be a good thing in a global media environment that has been totally saturated by advertising and manipulated by PR. This is as good a thing for the people of China as it is for everyone else in the world.
Laura Ling has an interesting film on the rise of blogging in China.
http://current.com/items/85283491/great_firewall_of_china.htm
For more on the Golden Shield Project and the 'Great Firewall' see: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Golden_Shield_Proje
Monday, 23 February 2009
Anarchy in Greece: "Billions for the banks: bullets for the children"
Inside what is properly known as the Faculty of Philosophy, Psychology, Pedagogy, Music and Mathematics, students discuss the origins of the uprising, and its causes. Rising unemployment is a driving force of unrest, students at the University talk about short-term contracts, "outsourcing", work without security or representation, of the impossibility of finding a good job unless connected in a client system of patronage and who-you-know. But what of society, more generally speaking? "Society has the face of freedom and choice," says Angeliki. "But that is all it is, a facade. This bad job or that bad job, this rubbish on television or that rubbish on television, this product or that product. We are rebelling against that false choice".
It is starting to become more clear where the sources for this unrest lies, it is not a protest against anything that is 'uniquely Greek' but instead an an expression against a postmodern society perforated with mass consumerism and globalised capitalism. There is indeed little coincidence that these riots took place at the time when it was becoming increasingly obvious that we were entering a global economic crisis, the 'culture of greed' of what we have heard so much recently was a cornerstone of what drove citizens to the streets of Athens. Greece, is not the only country however to be affected by this situation, this is indeed a global recession. Why then, where the Greek people have been motivated to the realms of revolutionary proportions, have the rest of us done nothing (?). Where were the people of Iceland, Bulgaria and Latvia before their inevitable economic crashes (?), meanwhile here in Britain, although we sit and grumble about it all and arrange civil debates to wind the subject round in a knot, little to nothing has been actually done in order to achieve a solution to these issues.
For the answers, we may look to Greece's past; historically Greece has been a hot-spot for political debate, discourse and protest; riots are not unknown in Athens, one may recall the restoration of Democracy in 1974; not to mention the fact that Greece is the birthplace of philosophy, a practice which has its roots in debating the origins of existence, knowledge and truth.
One of the leaders of the demonstrations is interviewed in the Observer article: "We are at one extreme edge of Europe, but not really part of Europe, and you are at the opposite edge, but also not part of Europe. Here, an uprising, there... nothing. Though the violence is the same in your country, in fact it's much worse. But you commit it against each other; knife crime, drunken fights and gangs. Here, we challenge the state and the banks, not each other. This is to do with consumption," she continues. "In 1975, Greece was promised the benefits of capitalism, but never really got to sample them like you did. We never had the delusion of wealth for the masses, of mass consumerism, which is now causing your crisis, but which neutralises you in a way. Your violence is about consumption: alcohol, drugs, television and clubbing. But we're not drunk or stoned, and we have just been tear-gassed on a demonstration, not in a nightclub. This is not a gang fight, it is a fight against the state".
Previous rebellions have been against a military junta (1967-1974), "There are similarities between then and now. The means of control have changed, and people enjoy a perception of freedom, but we would argue that the colonels were less powerful than a shopping mall, and in this way, Greece has turned another page in its history with this insurrection. Greece is a society in which individual rights were never established. This uprising has given people who were never part of our movement a new understanding of what it means to be who they are."
"There was a complete lack of political culture in the place," says Giorgos Sotiropoulos, who worked as part of the technical support team. "A call centre is as alienated as you can get. It's insidious. You're pitched against your co-worker by the fact that the supervisor is counting how many sales you make in how many calls and minutes. So it really mattered that it was a call centre we occupied, because the kind of enemy this insurrection in Greece is fighting is typified by this work. The enemy is amorphous, it is virtual, and that makes fighting it far more challenging than fighting a junta of colonels. Our enemy is a society which offers procedural freedom, and perceived freedom, but no physical, substantive freedom. But this situation is not irreversible, and we demonstrate this by finding a way of being free through uprising.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/feb/22/civil-unrest-athens
END
Wednesday, 18 February 2009
Guangdonghua - Aircon
Lang Hei gei - Cold air machine (air conditioner)
Tek - to drip
Seuy - water
Nei lang hei gei tek seuy!
Your air conditioner is dripping water
Guangdonghua: Greetings
Have you eaten yet?
Sek - To Eat
Jaw - Past tense particle
Fan - Rice
Mei - Yet
Sek jaw fan mei a? - Have you eaten yet?
Sek jaw la - I've eaten
Blog on, blog on
The online environment is rapidly taking up so much time to monitor and maintain, that it is cutting right over the time usually set aside for actually doing stuff, real stuff, you know, like in the 'real' world. Honestly, I'm confused and exhausted, I was told 3 or 4 years ago that I 'must' join something called 'Bebo', a fashionable online social networking device. I signed up, comedy ensues. By the time I had 'told' all my long-lost friends what I'm now 'upto', chosen an appropriate image which I felt accurately represented myself, chosen a video, some pictures, a wallpaper (?) and a pet pirate-donkey, I had no time left to do anything else. 'Fine', I thought, surely the hard bit was done, and I could get on with the business of making lots of online acquaintances. Wrong. Not much time had passed, when I started to wonder why none of my new 010010101 online friends responded to my messages. When I asked one, I was told that 'Bebo' was no good anymore, it was old, outdated, and that I should join the FACEbook. Intimidated, frustrated, and a bit sleepy, I was adamant to resist the FACEbook, which if I am honest I doubted its literary worth, and that its use of the word book was perhaps un-just. Time passed. Eventually, about a year or so ago I joined this book of faces, but only because I wanted to keep in closer touch with my friend was travelling through Australia at the time and had adopted this as his key means of communication. So by now, I was creating something of a database of online personas. Some time passed, if I'm honest I do tend to browse the pages of facebook on a daily basis, whereas the bebo has subsided, and no doubt my profile page will lie dorment like some kind of online time-capsule which some computer nerd will find in 100 years and discover that I arranged to go to the pub on a Tuesday night one time long ago......
So, I had declared my alliance to the facebook, I have a fair few decent pictures of myself in various settings up there, and I can keep in touch with the majority of people I actually want to communicate with. I also regularly maintain my Windows Space, which kind of came free with the hotmail/MSN address I've had for years, there are a few friends on there which I have no other form of regular communication with, so it stays on my online agenda. And If I am honest, this 'space' was the birthplace of the Wise Panda, one day some time ago when these four words appeared in my head and made their way down to my fingertips and subsequently onto the world in front of me. I was told that If I wanted to really publicize any writings, then I should open a blog on Blogger. Until, what I can imagine is a fairly short time ago, these words (blog, blogger) were not words, yet now they common words (such as: tarpaulin, apple, and radiator). And, so here we are. I have a new online persona here on blogger, as well as on facebook, windows spaces and bebo (not to mention the numerous emails from 'friends', who now say I must join something called 'Twatter'). With all these to maintain I have little time to engage in actual 'social networking', but then again maybe this new online version of socializing is the 'actual' version of it. I don't even know anymore. In any case, no matter what you think about them they are here and will probably go nowhere but continue to thrust their 'innovative' and 'liberating' sense of engagement and citizenship into our ever-electronicized (not a word, yet) lifestyle. What ever happened to pooh-sticks?
Tuesday, 17 February 2009
Clinton Vs. Asia
Hillary Clinton is paranoid about North Korea, jealous of China, and wants to "reassure" Japan that they are "important".
By visiting Asia first, Clinton has broken with a long tradition among new secretaries of state of visiting Europe or the Middle East first, a move seen as an acknowledgement of China's growing status as an economic and military power. Part of her visit to Japan is intended to reassure her hosts that Japan will not be bypassed diplomatically as the Obama attempts to win Chinese co-operation on trade, the environment and regional security.
Clinton, who said last year that "our relationship with China will be the most important bilateral relationship in the world this century," faces a potentially difficult meeting with Chinese leaders in Beijing.
The US hopes to persuade China, the world's biggest emitter of greenhouse gases, to support new attempts to cut carbon emissions, and to take a lead in restructuring the global financial system. The US is China's biggest export market and China is the largest holder of US treasury bonds.
She said human rights would be "part of our agenda" in talks with the Chinese president, Hu Jintao, and the premier, Wen Jiabao, scheduled for the end of the week after stays in Indonesia and South Korea.
The Guardianhttp://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/feb/16/clinton-japan-visit
Wednesday, 11 February 2009
Security Guards
Lets consider the many possible reasons for necessitating a person to stand beside a door. Perhaps terrorism is the worry, understandably, I mean we wouldn't want another 9/11 going on here, and what with universities being such priority targets for suicide bombers. But wait, the selection criteria for those who are permitted passage into the university follows a series of hard interrogation techniques that consists of:
1. Can i see your ID?
2. If you don;t have ID, you can come in anyway, just write a name on this paper
Maybe I'm the first one to spot this flaw in what is clearly a highly sophisticated system, if this place blows up after this blog post is published, I'll take the blame.
So then, perhaps this is about theft, the theft of a marketing theory book perhaps, which are so hard to come by these days, but then theres an extremely annoying sound that occurs in the library every time someone tries that.
So then, what is it, maybe they are concerned that someone may slip in and steal themselves an education, but that cant be right seeing as education costs are covered in this country anyway. I'm at a loss here, the only explanation for these people is that they are part of some kind of rehabilitation or community service programme that requires standing in one place and asking pointless questions.
We think its about time these layabouts had to fight for their own survival, and their right to call themselves students of semi-mediocre subjects in an attempt to redeem themselves from a life of insignificance.
Library gladiators is the solution to these problems.
Consider this, you're wandering round the library in search of a particular book, you turn into an aisle near the back of the library, usually the quietest area where no-one really sits, when suddenly, the student is confronted by several gladiators blocking his way with several padded-weapons. Better yet, on entry to the library, the student is immediately pummeled with a barrage of tennis-balls fired from a wall-mounted gun operated by a gladiator, who can swivel around in his chair in order to gain maximum perspective over the library. This can be applied to all aspects of university lfie, for instance when a student needs to submit a piece of coursework, he or she will be confronted by a number of gladiators throwing balls at them and trying to block them away from the coursework submission area, if the student fails to drop their coursework within the allotted time, they fail their degree. Simple.
The inner dialogue of the Grand Schnuppa....
Welcome....
A: Like
B: Don't like
C: something else
If any one feels the need, please comment or leave suggestions.